In The M•I•D•D•L•E Of It All (entry #2) - Juggling Generations, Memories, and Faith
Adulting in a “sandwich generation” blog series
This post is the 2nd from my “In the Middle” series, and as a middle age mom walking side by side with my middle school daughter, I am grateful to have “emotionally survived” the first half of her sixth grade year. We celebrated our daughter turning 12, watched her grow and blossom in the school band, playing the same flute I used back in high school. We watched her develop deeper friendships both at school and on her tumbling and trampoline team. We have seen interactions with boys changing ever so slightly, which we are not ready for.
As I shared in the first post in this series, I am a 48-year-old middle aged mother raising a middle school daughter. My older two kids are now college age but both live at home as commuter students. The age gap between them and our youngest child has resulted in her feeling like an only child at times and also having some of the greatest adult sibling support.
We are currently navigating the Christmas season and while we keep most of the focus on Jesus’ birth, as it should be, we don’t know for sure where we stand when it comes to “believing”. The magic in a child's' eyes at Christmastime is something to behold. Every year things feel different but I try to appreciate it all no matter what.
This holiday season for our family has felt different, as it is our first Christmas since my 80-year-old dad received his lung cancer diagnosis. He has other health conditions and along with his advanced aged it means he is not a surgery or chemo patient. He has gone through radiation treatment and with that there can come other challenges. Seeing how strong my mom is in her support and patience is inspiring.
This week I’ve been feeling the definition of the “sandwich generation” with it being my daughter’s final week of school before Christmas break while my dad has been making several ER pit stops as he fends off Covid. I try not to come across as too busy to take care of the things that matter most and no matter what will juggle working, running errands and school activities until all my energy is gone.
I find myself having to remember to share with my kids what they need to know about their Papa’s health without making it feel like a burden to them. I see opportunities to take care of myself that I pass on because I see the need for my time to be spent elsewhere. I try to remember that I need to show up as my best self when sometimes I am barely even showing up.
Being a spouse, a parent and a child all at the same time does not come with a guidebook. And knowing how to balance where to focus in each of the roles is not easy. I have personally been going to scripture and prayer more consistently and eliminate any comparison of others when we all know most people don’t share their authentic self.
I absolutely love the journey I am on and while there has been more change in two years than many prior years combined, I can say I see God’s hand in it all. No matter where you are in the stages of life, I still believe that as a parent you are making a huge impact on the lives of others, there’s no higher calling. Here’s to continuing to make great middle school memories!
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