Life Lessons Learned - A New Chapter

In this first writing I wanted to share a little about my family. My oldest daughter turned 20 this year and started her Junior year of college. As we celebrated Jordan's 20th birthday, I realized we had made it through the agonizing teenage years in one piece and this gave me so many reasons to reflect and thank God. Our relationship with Jordan was very strained during those difficult teenage years but we are so blessed to have a close, loving relationship now. She and I even have tattoos of each other's handwriting saying "I love you" on our side that we had done on her 19th birthday.

Our other two kids are 17 and 10, at the time of this writing, so they came along in the midst of the fast-paced craziness that we call life. Jacob is a strong and independent young man who is going to do big things. He's smarter than any of us but is such a reflective, quiet spirit. I can't believe he's going to be turning 18 and graduating high school in '24. Jozie is our youngest and gets the benefit of two awesome older siblings who can give her advice and parents who have a bit more experience with raising kids this time around. She's the most talkative of the family and has more energy than all of us combined.

Being a working mom for 20 years provides plenty of opportunities to dwell on regrets, or simply do like I did and choose to focus on recognizing and celebrating the accomplishment for what it is - amazing! I am proud of the work I did, and for the lives I impacted. I am living through a reinvention of myself after my career of nearly 20 years came to a close. I am most excited about the intentional time I get to spend with my family that I took for granted before.

This photo is of us on our new property we purchased in 2022 where we are currently building a home in east Tennessee. My husband, Jason, is my rock. He’s the most creative person I know, as in he sees life and projects the way he hopes they will end up, not always how things are now. When he’s really into an idea, he’s going to sketch it out rather than talk about it. He sees things in such a positive light, while sometimes not realizing the gravity of a situation. He’s the one that grounds me and I’m the one that brings reality to the situation. He’s the optimist and I am the realist. Jason is a Graphic Designer by trade, but became a very talented woodworker once we moved back home to Tennessee in 2014. He’s got a Facebook page called “Red Barn Timberworks” if you would like to see some of his work.

You will see some recurring things in my writing. I will share with you the ways I have focused on the mental health of our children as well as my own. So many things in life can be better understood with a strong mental health focus. I am a Christian who believes and trusts that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. I will admit that I am a controlling person when it comes to what is happening within my family. While I know the importance of relying on God, I like to feel in control. I handle the finances, schedules, appointments and the like for each person in our family.

I struggle to hand off that control as my kids are getting older but I am working on it. I like planning for a trip as much as the trip itself. I dislike air travel because of the lack of control I feel when in an airport or airplane. It all feels too chaotic for me. I like things to be a certain way and appreciate the sense of being in control. I am sure this "control-freak" personality stems from being raised in a pretty protected environment. I didn't witness much turmoil or negativity growing up. We lived in small-fish towns for the most part, attended church three-time a week as a family, my parents have been married for over 50 years, and my own children have been raised with a lot of that same sense of "safety". No drama needed. Living in a bubble is fine with me. I want more than anything to keep my family safe, healthy and happy.

Now I did say I am a realist and I am fully aware of the world we are living in. I am currently working through giving more of my life to God and that includes the control-freak personality I have worn as a badge of honor for a very long time. If you've been through a season in life where an extreme lack of control occurred, you know what I am saying. I'll be sharing more about the experiences that led me to this realization as well as how I am doing along the journey. I'm excited you're here to join me.